What School Forgot to Teach Me About Being a School Mom

school momAs I have frequently posted, “Domestic” is not a term that my friends would use to describe me. My family would not even use the term to describe me. Describing me as “Domestic” in front of my closest friends would illicit laughs and in front of my family would illicit a shake of the head accompanied by some mumbling about how “she tries”. Because of this, the month of August is especially difficult for my inner “non-domestic diva”. August is a month that requires extreme levels of concentration, discipline, and organization from families and especially from moms. Why?? It’s “Back to School” month!! Yes, that dreadfully expensive, yet wonderful time of year!! It has recently come to my attention that I might just be the world’s WORST school mom. Not that I am overly concerned with comparing myself to other school moms, if I want to measure my many “Mom-Failures”, I just spend five minutes on Pinterest. But, I have realized that school taught me NOTHING I needed to know to be a “school mom”. Even in Grad School, nothing has come close to preparing me for the month of August with school-age kids. Below are a few of the biggest things that school NEVER taught me about being a “school mom”:

1.) School shopping for my kids requires intense and strategic warfare. Who knew? I don’t know where I will find a yellow, plastic two-pocket folder with clips inside and no binder holes. I already checked six stores and two drugstores and NO ONE carries or stocks that kind of folder!!!! And why does my 1st grader need this folder anyway?? Then, there are the pointed scissors, which the stores run on sale for $.50, but only stock two pairs of. So, I put on my fierce “war-paint” makeup and go to the store with all the other “school moms” who better not touch those $.50 pointed scissors because I need to buy BOTH pairs and I don’t want to pay $1.99 to buy the other brand that the store does stock in abundance.

2.) Mastering a School Calendar requires a PhD in Organizational Management. Am I the only “school mom” who finds the school calendar cumbersome and difficult? Is it a “blue diamond” week for my second grader? If it is, he has Physical Education on Tuesday. If it’s a “orange square” week, then he has Physical Education on Friday. I don’t really care if it’s a “green circle” week or if it’s a “gold star” week, I just need to know what day to send my kid to school in his tennis shoes, so I can be a “gold star school mom”!!! And don’t even get me started on grading periods, report cards, reading calendars, and teacher in-service days…ugh!

3.) Parents can (and will) get homework, too. . . (read the rest by clicking on over to our main site HERE)

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